The Butterfly Effect That is Infatuation
Imagine crossing paths with your crush. Your heartbeat suddenly spikes up the moment you see the person. A blush may (or may not) slowly creep up on your cheeks. Butterflies swarm like crazy in your stomach. You resist the urge to stutter and blurt out nonsense when talking to the person of your interest. Surely, you’ve seen this scenario in teen romance movies.
Or, perhaps, experienced this yourself.
You think you’re drunk in love. You may want to take a double check. Maybe it’s just a simple case of infatuation.
How do you know if you’re really in love?
When you’re interested in someone, it’s pretty normal for the “infatuation or love” question to pop up in your head. Telling them apart can get confusing—after all, a lot of feelings involved between the two things are similar. The initial stages may be the same, but there is a big difference between like and love as your feelings develop.
The excitement, anxiety, and intense feelings that come with being infatuated causes you to act differently than you normally would. Let’s be real—sometimes, we go way too gaga over a person. Not to sound condescending, but infatuation seems to be superficial, using only physical attraction as basis for affection.
Infatuation or love?
Here’s the thing with infatuation: you have this fascination with the idea of being with someone. You think you’re head over heels in love with a person, but you really aren’t. It sets the bar for unrealistic standards and ridiculously high expectations, such as the idea of a perfect romance. On the contrary, love is not without flaws. Imperfections aside, you two still stick it out anyway
In a way, being infatuated over someone makes you forget that you are your own human being. Even though we all want to please, shutting everyone else out is not an option. Revolving your life around solely on that person is unhealthy—that’s borderline obsession. As Bella Pope puts it, “pleasing someone and wanting happiness for someone are two completely different things.” Keep in mind that you still have a life of your own. Your own happiness matters just as much as your relationship.
Lastly, always remember that infatuation comes at you in the blink of an eye. It may be instant, but the feeling fizzles out as quickly as it came. However, love is a slow and gradual process; it takes time for it to grow and blossom. Love is a deep connection; it only happens when you truly know the person inside out. It’s about accepting the good, the bad, and the ugly—and love them regardless.
Forget how romance is portrayed in movies—it simply doesn’t happen overnight. If the infatuation stage is short-lived, love stays with you for a long time.